The Real Issue

In John 4, Jesus is tired and sits down near a well while His disciples go into town to buy some food. Read the story here.

Now just imagine how weary you would feel having to put up with the disciples nonsense 24/7. Fortunately, Jesus is more interested in the woman who comes to draw water than He is in being able to relax for a few minutes.

If you’re familiar with the story, you know Jesus starts a conversation by simply asking, “Will you give me a drink?”

As they begin to talk, Jesus intentionally guides the conversation toward deep truths about the woman and about Himself. She, on the other hand, seems to want to keep the conversation at the surface. She doesn’t really want Jesus getting personal.

Do you do that? Do you try to keep Jesus from digging down to the real issue in your life?

You’ve asked God to help you control your temper, find a job, stop worrying, get over your pornography addiction or make your spouse more attentive to your needs. But maybe God wants to deal with the real issue that lies beneath each of those requests.

What if you’re angry because when others disappoint you it reminds you of how many times your father disappointed you when you were a child?

Maybe you’ve believed the lie that you’ll only feel valuable and significant if you have an important job.

Or you struggle with pornography because you replaced God with sex as the #1 priority in your life. And now sex has become an idol that has enslaved you.

Rather than deal with the real issues, we prefer to keep Jesus at arms-length where He can’t dig too deeply. We’d rather talk about which mountain is the right one to worship on instead of the fact that we’re worshiping all the wrong things in the first place: money, sex, television, media, food, clothes, cars, houses, what others think about us, etc.

What if the next time you got alone and started to pray, God interrupted you and said, “Excuse me. I know that feels very important to you, but I really think we need to talk about something else today. That thing you keep avoiding. You know what I’m talking about. Let’s get it on the table and deal with the real issue.”

What would “it” be for you? What’s the real issue?

If you know, then maybe God just brought it up and now is the time to deal with it.

If you don’t know what it is, then ask Him.

Life to the Full

In John 10:10, Jesus said, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”

Today, His desire is that you experience life to the full. Not just a little life. Not some or most of life. He wants you to experience life to the full.

I think if we’re honest, most of us would say we’re not experiencing life to the full. So what’s gone wrong?

I actually only quoted the second half of John 10:10. The first half says, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy…” Jesus desires to give us life to the full, but Satan also has a desire and that’s to steal from us, kill us and destroy us.

In Romans 8:5-8, Paul gives us some insight into how this happens:

⁵ Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. ⁶ The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. ⁷ The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. ⁸ Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.

If you have placed your faith in Christ to forgive your sin, then your old, sinful nature died. You now have a new nature that is alive and able to relate to God. But we still have this part of us called “the flesh” that hangs around. It’s that internal desire that still wants to resist God.

Think of the flesh as that part of us that wants to get legitimate needs met in illegitimate ways. God has created us with healthy appetites and desires for love, sex, food, significance, pleasure, etc. And God has also prescribed healthy boundaries around each of those to protect us and provide for us.

For example, sex is an incredible gift from God. It’s meant to join a husband and wife on a physical, emotional and spiritual level. Within marriage, it’s a gift to be enjoyed with great freedom and frequency. That’s the boundary that God has put in place: marriage.

So what does Satan attempt to do? He uses this world system to appeal to our flesh to step outside the boundary. Just as he tempted Eve to eat what God had forbidden, he whispers to the single person, “Did God really say not to have sex? Come on, God didn’t really mean that. If you really care about the person, then it’s okay to do it. Go ahead, you’ll see…”

Or he’ll tempt a husband or wife to stray outside their marriage. “If you’re spouse isn’t going to meet your needs, then you deserve this. No one will find out. You’re not the one who’s at fault anyway.”

It’s a battle for control of our minds. If we set our minds on the flesh, then we will live according to the flesh. The more time and attention we give to the flesh, the stronger it gets and the harder it is to resist.

Satan appeals to our flesh. He tempts us to get our needs met on his terms, not God’s.

What Satan doesn’t tell us is that what he’s tempting us to do will eventually lead to death. Death of a relationship. Death of a family. Death of our reputation. Death of our fellowship with God.

Satan’s temptations wouldn’t be effective if he ever told us the truth, would it? No one would willingly choose death. But he’s a deceiver and a liar, so he never tells us that feeding our flesh by getting our needs met outside of God’s boundaries leads to bondage, addiction and death.

God’s plan is for life though. Those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires and it leads to life and peace. As we set our minds on the Spirit’s desires, we grow stronger. We know God better. We trust Him more. We experience more of His power. We become more and more like Christ. Our minds come under God’s control.

We all get to decide today whether we’re going to feed the flesh or feed the Spirit. The one we feed more gets stronger.

Many of us find ourselves entrenched in sin with little hope of escape. We’ve been in bondage to it for so long that it has defined us. We’ve tried to get out and maybe even experience success for a few days or even weeks, but then we’re right back into it and feel worse than ever.

Maybe your desire for sin feels so strong because your desire for God feels so weak. Yes, you need to do your best to stop feeding the flesh, but at the same time, you need to be feeding the Spirit.

It’s probably a good idea to watch less television and spend less time on the internet, but just trying to starve the flesh isn’t enough. Also spend generous amounts of time in God’s word, so you’ll begin to think His thoughts, not the world’s.

If your iPod is loaded with garbage–remove it and replace it with some really good worship music.

If you have “friends” who aren’t a very good influence, then make the wise choice to move on and find real friends who will encourage your relationship with God, not tempt and encourage you to sin.

Life to the full is yours. Jesus desires it for you. You and I just have to want it more than we want the desires of the flesh.

Remember, it’s a battle for your mind. Whoever gets control of your mind wins.

What Were They Thinking?!

Have you ever heard of someone making a really stupid decision and asked yourself, “What were they thinking?”

You really don’t have to look very far to find those people. In just the last few days, we have…

Charlie Sheen. Hollywood star. His incoherent rants in the last couple of weeks cost him his $2 million per episode contract.

Jim Tressel. Ohio State football coach. Lied to the NCAA about information he was aware of concerning some of his players. He’s been suspended by Ohio State for two games and fined $250,000. The NCAA won’t be so kind.

Tiki Barber. Former NFL running back and broadcaster for NBC. Left his wife, who was 8 months pregnant, for a 23-year-old NBC intern. NBC fired him from his $300,000 a year job. Now Tiki is trying to get back into football four years after he retired. He needs the money.

Of course, we could compile a long list of pastors and Christian leaders who have been equally as dumb.

And just in case you think I’m pointing a finger, I don’t need to look any further than the mirror to find someone who does really stupid things. There’s no one who has even come close to giving me as much trouble as I’ve given myself.

What were we thinking?

Yesterday, we looked at Deuteronomy 4:1-2.

Today, we’ll pick up the next two verses…

You saw with your own eyes what the LORD did at Baal Peor. The LORD your God destroyed from among you everyone who followed the Baal of Peor, but all of you who held fast to the LORD your God are still alive today.

Moses is passing on God’s commands to Israel right before they cross into the Promised Land. In these two verses, he’s reminding them of what they saw God do at Baal Peor. He destroyed the Israelites who followed the Baal of Peor.

Well, what does all that mean?

To find out, we need to go back to Numbers 25:1-3…

While Israel was staying in Shittim, the men began to indulge in sexual immorality with Moabite women, who invited them to the sacrifices to their gods. The people ate and bowed down before these gods. So Israel joined in worshiping the Baal of Peor. And the LORD’s anger burned against them.

The region of Shittim is just across the Jordan River from Jericho–the first city the Israelites would attack after crossing into the Promised Land. They are camped out here 40+ years into their journey through the desert. In other words, they are SO close to making it out of the desert and into the good land God has promised to give them.

But there’s a problem. Some of the men are seduced by women living in that region. The women invite the Israelite men to come sacrifice to their god, Baal of Peor. Worshiping this god is thought to have required “sensual indulgence.” The men indulged in sexual immorality with the Moabite women and worshiped their foreign god.

And God’s anger burned against them. And 24,000 of them died from a plague.

We really don’t have to go very far to find out why this was such a serious violation. The first two of the 10 commandments are:

“I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.

“You shall have no other gods before me.

“You shall not make for yourself an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments.

What were they thinking? They were so close. They endured so much. They had so much to look forward to. They had everything going for them.

And yet…they were stupid. They were unfaithful to their God. Just when everything they’d waited for was within reach.

I suspect that these 24,000 men didn’t suddenly decide to abandon God. Like you and me, it was gradual. One decision, one day at a time. They weren’t quite so intent on seeking God. Their eyes, their hearts, their minds wandered. They wanted other things more than they wanted God.

Do you relate? I do.

Maybe this season of Lent is the time to turn away from those things that keep grabbing for our attention, those things (and people?) that keep us from being faithful to the one true God.

Top 10 Ways to Quickly Strengthen Your Marriage

Last week, I posted “45 Ways to Slowly Kill Your Marriage.” I had a request for how to strengthen a marriage, so here are my top 10 ways to quickly strengthen your marriage:

1. Meet your spouse’s needs. First, you need to know what they are. Become a student of your spouse to find out. Write down everything you learn. Then start meeting those needs.

Yes, it’s that simple. Easy? Not always. Simple? Yes.

If you’re trying to come up with some needs, here are a few to get things kick-started: conversation, alone time, words of encouragement, romance, a hug, quality time with you, help with the housework, sex, a weekend away, an extra hour of sleep, respect, a phone call “just because”, a massage, etc.

Keep in mind, you’re looking for your spouse’s needs, not your needs. Also, while you’re at it, discover some wants and meet those, too.

2. Be third. God first. Spouse second. You third.

I know you also have needs and wants that aren’t being met and you may be giving a lot more than your spouse, but choose to meet your spouse’s needs even if yours aren’t being met.

What’s the alternative? Pull back and wait until your spouse goes first?

How well do you think that’s going to work?

I know it won’t be easy, but you will reap what you sow. Be the bigger person and begin serving your spouse. See what God does.

3. Pray together. If this is a scary thought to you, then start small. Before you go to sleep tonight, hold hands and say, “Lord, thank you for my husband/wife.” If it’s not so scary, then take a few minutes to pray for each other.

4. Believe God. Difficulties are inevitable, so learning how to deal with them as a couple is critical. The most important thing you can do is focus your attention on God, not your circumstances. Your financial crisis, medical issue or rebellious child may seem overwhelming, but it’s not to God. He has a solution and He has peace for you. Read Hebrews 11:6.

Choose to trust Him and not give in to worry, fear and anxiety. Those negative emotions will only poison your marriage.

How do you begin believing God, not your circumstances? There’s no substitute for spending time reading the Bible. In it, God has revealed Himself, His purposes and His ways. As we discover who God is and how He works, our capacity to trust Him is enlarged. Difficult circumstances no longer seem insurmountable when seen through God’s eyes.

5. Be your best. About 18 months into marriage, Robyn and I attended a “Weekend to Remember” marriage conference. During that weekend, I realized what a poor job I was doing as her husband. I decided then to be the best husband I could be. That was in 1987. While I’m far from perfect, I’m much further along than had I never made that decision.

6. Give grace. Your spouse is going to blow it. A lot. What are you going to do then? Keep score? Hold a grudge? Punish? Where will that get you?

What if instead, you gave grace and forgiveness? The way God does to us. What if you chose to treat your spouse the way you want to be treated when you fail? Again, I know this isn’t easy, but that leads to the next point…

7. Be filled with the Holy Spirit. In Ephesians 5, Paul gives instructions to husbands and wives. It’s some heavy stuff. And in our own strength, it’s impossible stuff. So prior to giving those instructions, in verse 18, he said, “…be filled with the Holy Spirit.”

To be filled with the Holy Spirit means to be under his influence. In fact, Paul compares being drunk to being filled with the Spirit. When someone is drunk, they speak and act in a way that indicates they’re under the influence of alcohol. When we are under the influence of the Holy Spirit, we will speak and act like He desires.

How can you be filled with the Holy Spirit? Simply by surrendering control of your life to Him. You can be in control or He can. He’s not going to fight you for control. He’s going to wait for you to give it to Him. When you do, you will experience His wisdom and power in your life.

8. Get healthy. You can’t change your spouse, but you can change you. Commit to getting healthy both physically and emotionally. If you’re not eating right or exercising, then you won’t feel well. If you don’t feel well, you won’t have the energy to invest in your marriage. If you don’t know where to start, click here.

You also need to commit to good emotional health. If your leg is broken, you’ll have an extremely difficult time running a mile. It would be painfully obvious that what you need is a doctor to set your leg in a cast, so you can heal.

The problem with our emotional health is the broken things are less obvious. The consequences are no less serious though. If you’re walking around with unresolved issues from your childhood, hurt and resentment from a previous marriage, a bad experience in a legalistic church or some other emotionally traumatic event, then you do not have the emotional health required for a successful marriage. You just don’t. So get help.

How do you know if you need help?

If you often feel angry, anxious or depressed–you need help.

If you need _______________ to feel good, relieve stress, unwind or shake off a bad day–you need help. Put whatever you want in the blank: food, alcohol, drugs, pornography, shopping, sex, gambling, chocolate, etc.

If you often feel guilty or ashamed–you need help.

If you are verbally abusive to your spouse–you need help.

If you’ve ever hit your spouse (or been hit)–you need help.

If you’ve lost any hope of your situation getting better–you need help.

Find a Christian counselor and make an appointment. Do it today. You’ll be stuck until you do.

9. Be playful. Sure marriage takes some work, but it doesn’t have to be all work. Lighten up a little. Have fun with each other. Take a walk. Take dancing lessons. Take a shower (together). Go on a bike ride. Cook together. Send each other suggestive text messages. Go to a dollar store and buy each other five gifts. Exchange them over coffee and dessert. Play a game. Put the kids to bed early, order Chinese food and watch a funny movie.

Just enjoy each other and laugh together. Like when you were dating.

10. Get away. If you can afford it, spend a couple nights in a bed and breakfast or hotel. Don’t take any work. Leave the laptop at home. Turn off your phones. Focus on each other. Eat some good meals. Take walks. Talk about your dreams. Consider attending a “Weekend to Remember” for your weekend away.

Getting away from the normal routine of life will do wonders for your marriage. If you can’t remember the last time you got away, then schedule something now.

Obviously, these all work better and more quickly if you both commit to do them, but don’t wait for your spouse. (Read #2 again.) Do what you know to do. Start right now. Trust God with the results.

Okay, here’s a bonus one:

11. Be your spouse’s biggest fan. While you’re studying your spouse looking for needs, also be on the lookout for strengths. What is your spouse good at? What do they enjoy doing? What are they passionate about? What gets them excited?

Once you have those answers, encourage them to pursue those activities, ideas or dreams. Cheer them on. Help them. Help find the resources to make it happen. Do whatever you can to help the vision become reality.

As often as you can, say, “I’m so proud of you.”

45 Ways to Slowly Kill Your Marriage

In no particular order…

1. Assume your way is right and your spouse’s way is wrong.
2. Fail to discover or understand your spouse’s needs.
3. If you happen to stumble upon your spouse’s needs, just don’t meet them.
4. Never put yourself in your spouse’s shoes or try to see things from any perspective other than your own.
5. Secretly view pornography or spend time in online chat rooms.
6. Don’t ever talk about money, sex, children or your schedules.
7. Never address your past–things like your parents divorce, abuse, addictions, etc. Just limp along emotionally damaged.
8. Put your Bible somewhere out of sight, then try to forget where it is.
9. Keep score of all the good things you do and all the bad things your spouse does.
10. Tell your spouse, “This is just who I am. You should just accept me.”
11. Take for granted everything your spouse does. Never express appreciation.
12. Don’t resolve conflicts as they arise–let things build up.
13. Develop as many friendships and interests apart from your spouse as you possibly can.
14. Don’t be gracious or forgiving. Make your spouse pay.
15. Avoid showing affection, including hugs, kisses and holding hands
16. Erode trust by keeping secrets and telling little lies.
17. Develop at least one strong relationship with someone of the opposite sex with whom you can share your marriage problems.
18. Compare your spouse’s flaws and weaknesses with others’ strengths.
19. Let yourself go physically by not exercising, never trying a new hairstyle, not showering or buying new clothes.
20. Put all of your money and energy into the wedding day, but invest nothing in all the days after the wedding.
21. Take advantage of every opportunity to get your feelings hurt.
22. Limit sex to no more than once a week.
23. Avoid texting, emailing or calling each other throughout the day.
24. Accumulate as much credit card debt as quickly as possible.
25. Criticize, correct and interrupt your spouse in front of others.
26. Flirt with others, but not your spouse.
27. Try to be as inattentive as possible. Television, the newspaper or a laptop are helpful distractions.
28. You probably can’t avoid buying a Christmas gift, but you should never buy gifts just for no reason. Your spouse’s birthday should be recognized with a card only. Slip a $20 bill in it to make it worse.
29. Develop routines and stick to them. Meals, dates and sex should be predictable. Boring if possible.
30. Don’t read any books, listen to any podcasts or attend any conferences that could strengthen your marriage.
31. Go to bed at different times.
32. Keep your spouse insecure and on edge by occasionally mentioning divorce.
33. Keep raising the bar and moving the target so your spouse will always feel like a failure.
34. Place your work, your children and your hobbies above your marriage.
35. Make mountains out of mole hills.
36. Assume the worst about your spouse. Never give the benefit of the doubt.
37. Fail to anticipate trials and difficulties in the following areas: finances, health, in-laws, child raising, communicating with each other, etc.
38. If it’s absolutely necessary to apologize, then be sure it’s followed with the word “but.”
39. Use absolute statements whenever possible. For example: “You never help around the house.” Or, “You’re always complaining.”
40. If your spouse confronts you about something, even if it’s done in a nice way, be sure to have a list of grievances to counter with. Under no circumstances should you admit fault.
41. Make your own comfort, security and pleasure your top priority. Don’t invite your spouse to join you in living for a cause bigger than yourselves.
42. Keep things serious. Playfulness is for kids.
43. If you are angry or upset and your spouse asks if you’re okay, answer by saying, “I’m fine.”
44. Watch TV, spend time online and/or bring work home, so that you’ll be able to say you just don’t have time to read your Bible or talk with your spouse.
45. Don’t attend church together and under no circumstances should you pray together.

Feel free to add to the list by leaving a comment…

Walking By Faith

A good friend of mine has turned down some job offers because they’re not in the city in which he and his wife believe God has called them to live and help start a church. And yet my friend is currently without a job and running out of money. He and his wife also have two young sons, so there’s a lot at stake.

His situation reminds me of something similar I went through in the late ’90′s. I was in the process of being laid off from a job, but felt God leading me to wait patiently for what He would reveal. The more I prayed, the more God said to wait patiently. And so I did…for several months. A week after I was laid off, God opened a door for a new job.

During those few months, it looked like I was being passive, irresponsible and foolish. I wasn’t looking for a job, filling out applications or going on interviews. I was praying and waiting. Why? Because I believe it’s what God was leading me to do.

My friend is praying and waiting and actively looking for a job in a particular city. Why? Because he believes it’s what God is leading him to do.

Many people would think he’s crazy for turning down job offers. After all, it’s tough to find a job in this economy. What’s he thinking?

Yeah, what’s he thinking?

And while we’re at it, what was Noah thinking when he built that ark?

How about Moses leading millions of people out of captivity only to get backed up against the Red Sea by the Egyptian army? What was he thinking?

What was Abraham thinking when he left his home to go to a land God said He’d show him? And what was he thinking when he raised the knife to kill his son, Isaac?

What was Joseph thinking when he resisted the advances of his boss’s wife and ended up in prison because she falsely accused him?

What was Daniel thinking when he disobeyed the king so he could be faithful to God and then was tossed into a den of lions as punishment?

What were they thinking?

In hindsight, these men are all heroes of the faith. They faced impossible circumstances, they believed God and He came through for them. In hindsight.

But in the midst of their difficulties, each of these men looked like fools. They couldn’t see how or when things were going to work out and neither could anyone else.

Remember, God may, check that–God will–call you to take a step of faith that will look foolish to those around you. He hasn’t spoken to them though. He has spoken to you. He is the only One you must please. You don’t need to explain yourself to others. They won’t understand anyway since most people are not walking by faith.

Most people have ordered their lives in such a way as to eliminate or at least minimize any need for faith. They may call it living cautiously or prudently or risk-averse. Call it what you will, but it’s not a life of faith and it’s not the kind of life God blesses.

Maybe God hasn’t called you to move to another city and help start a church. He might though.

But what is He calling you to do today? Are you listening to Him? Would you hear Him if He called your name today? Or is He being drowned out by an iPod, Facebook, Twitter, a couple hundred text messages and a few hours of television?

Living by faith is the “normal” Christian life.

So are you trusting God today? I mean the kind of trust where if He doesn’t come through, you’re sunk. The kind of trust where He’s not only plan A, He’s plan B, C, D…

Is there a step of faith God is calling you to today? Ask Him. While you’re waiting for Him to answer, try one of these:

• Give away a sum of money that will make you nervous. That might be $50 for some of you. For others, it might mean $5,000. Or more.
• Walk across the street and meet your new neighbor.
• Meet your spouse’s needs even though he/she isn’t meeting yours.
• Tell God you’re willing to do anything He tells you to do, go anywhere He tells you to go, whenever He tells you to do it.
• Tell someone about your addiction and that you need help.
• Stop having sex until you’re married.

If your relationship with God seems stale or boring, then maybe you’ve been living by sight, not by faith. A life of faith is not boring. Sometimes scary. But never boring.

When you walk by faith, you will experience God in ways the sight-walkers never get to. You will see Him use you in ways you didn’t know were possible. You will discover how He has uniquely designed you to advance His kingdom. You will see Him open doors, often at the last minute, you never could have on your own.

You were made to live by faith in God.

Are you?

“And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.”  –Hebrews 11:6

Marriage Book

I started work on a marriage book this week. It’s been on my mind for a long time, but I haven’t done much to move it from my head to words on a page. Then a couple weeks ago after doing a sermon on marriage, a friend approached me and said, “You need to write a book and I have the outline.”

We met a few days later. Sure enough, she had the outline. And I really liked it. That was the tipping point. It feels wrong to not write it now.

In writing a book though, I’m asking myself the same kind of questions I ask when writing this blog, only multiplied by a hundred.

“Who are you to write a book?”

“There are so many marriage books–do we really need another one?”

“How can you write a book when you don’t always live up to what you say you believe?”

All good questions for which I don’t have good answers. Often I feel like I’m “winning” at my marriage, but sometimes I feel like I’m a selfish jerk. And sometimes I just feel like a big hypocrite who should probably be struck by lightening.

And yet, here I go.

My goal is to be finished with a first draft by the end of October. (It’ll help me to say that publicly to put some pressure on myself to finish.) You may see some of the content in this blog over the next couple of months. I think you’ll find it interesting whether you’re married or not.

I would like to ask for your help though.

What questions do you have about marriage? About the roles of husbands and wives? About choosing a spouse, if you’re single? About problems you’re dealing with? About the differences between men and women? About anything else?

Nothing is off limits. If you could see my outline, you’d know I mean it.

You can use the comment section or email me at: greggstutts@yahoo.com

By the way, now’s a good time to thank you for reading. I’m grateful to be able to share this journey with so many of you from all over the world. Also, I haven’t mentioned it very often, but if you’d like to subscribe to this blog and receive it by email–just sign up in that box over there to the right that says, “Enter your email address”, then just click on the subscribe button.

Don’t worry, your email address will never be sold, traded or anything else. You’ll just get new blog posts in your inbox from now on.

Thanks again!

The Marriage Experience

Last Monday, we started “The Marriage Experience” at The Church at Arkansas. It’s a nice dinner for married and engaged couples, followed by a short talk on the subject of marriage. It’s not just about a 90-minute meeting each week though. I asked each couple to commit to four things:

1. Pray together daily.

2. Talk to each for 20 minutes every day.

3. Individually, read their Bible for 20 minutes a day.

4. Enjoy sex 3 times a week (married couples only).

If you’re married, why don’t you join us? Starting Monday night at 6:30 p.m. central time, we’ll be streaming live. I hope you’ll check it out.

By the way, you can also use that link on Sunday mornings at 10:30 a.m. on June 13 and 20 to join us for our weekly worship service. I’ll be teaching a two-part message entitled, “Victory Over the Darkness.”

Title Deed (to your life)

Bigger is not always better. Just ask Jesus.

In Luke 14:25-35, He had a large crowd following. Exciting, right? Who wouldn’t love that? High energy. Momentum. Things are starting to take off.

That’s when Jesus turns to the crowd and tells them they can’t be one of His disciples if they don’t hate their family and their own life and unless they die to themselves.

I wonder if the disciples looked at each other and thought, “What did He just say?! He’s going to kill this thing if He doesn’t stop talking like that!”

Clearly, Jesus wasn’t just interested in a big crowd. He was looking for fully-devoted followers who were willing to lay aside everything for Him. He wasn’t interested in being a priority on a to-do list, He was interested in being THE priority who came before everyone and everything else.

And before they were too quick to follow Him, He told them to first estimate the cost. Were they willing to pay the price of following Him? He didn’t want an impulsive decision that would soon be forgotten when the going got rough.

Have you estimated the cost of following Jesus? Once you have, also estimate the cost of not following Him.

Which one is more costly?

If you decide to follow Jesus, I mean truly follow Him–putting Him before everyone and everything else, then you may find it helpful to formalize that decision. Below, is a title deed. A title deed to your life. Read it through. If you agree with it, copy it and sign it. Feel free to add to it or modify it. The point is to make a firm decision.

Title Deed to My Life

Because I believe that:

1. all things, including me, were created by and for Jesus (Colossians 1:16),
2. I exist for His pleasure (Ephesians 1:5) and can do nothing apart from Him (John 15:5),
3. God loves me unconditionally and will never stop loving me (John 3:16, Romans 8:35),
4. God’s desire is for me to live forever in friendship with Him (Revelation 21:3),
5. I deserved death, but instead received eternal life as a free gift (Romans 6:23),
6. Jesus died in my place (Romans 5:8), thereby rescuing me from the dominion of darkness and transferring me to His kingdom (Colossians 1:13),
7. He promised He would never fail me nor forsake me (Hebrews 13:5),
8. the Holy Spirit lives in me and gives me power to live (Acts 1:8),
9. God has promised eternal rewards for my faithful service in this life (Matthew 25:21),
10. God is going to make heaven and earth new and my real home will forever be with Him in the New Jerusalem (Revelation 21),
11. money and possessions are on loan to me to be used to advance God’s kingdom, not to simply further my comfort and lifestyle (Matthew 25:14),

I, __________________________________­_______, hereby surrender total control of my life to God (Romans 12:1-2). My surrender is unconditional. I relinquish all rights to:

1. my heart, hopes, emotions, desires, dreams, goals and plans,
2. my money, possessions, bank accounts, investments, cars, houses and all other property,
3. my time, schedule, appointments, priorities, hobbies and recreation,
4. my physical body, strength, energy, health and diet,
5. my relationships, including, but not limited to my parents, spouse, children, extended family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, teachers and strangers,
6. my career, job, business, ministry, education and ability to produce wealth,
7. my gifts, abilities, talents, strengths, weaknesses and experiences,
8. my mind, ideas, thoughts and words,
9. what I look at and listen to, including all media (internet, movies, music, books, magazines, etc.),
10. my past, present and future,
11. anything and everything else.

Finally, I acknowledge that:

1. God has forgiven me totally by grace, not by any works I’ve done, and that I now live by and under God’s grace. My best works or worst sins will never cause God to love me any more or any less.
2. I must depend on the Holy Spirit for the power to be a disciple of Christ. I am unable to do it alone.
3. I actually never had any rights to relinquish since all I am and all I have is from God anyway.

“Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:12-14)

_____________________________                              ____________________

Signed                                                                             Date

_____________________________                             _____________________

Witnessed by                                                                  Date

Heaven

The weather here in Fayetteville has been absolutely gorgeous this week. Sunny. Mid-70′s. Light breezes. April and October are probably the best months to live here. Actually, I’d have to give the nod to October for two reasons. October has football. April has pollen. Still, April is great.

Sometimes though, beautiful weather and pleasant circumstances can have an adverse effect. When the sun is shining, the bills are paid and everyone is healthy, I tend to lose sight of the unseen. My soul feels content with life as it is.

I was about to say, “but I’m not made for this life.” I don’t think that’s entirely true though. I was made for this life.

God gave me a physical body to live in and relate to this physical world. He gave me five senses, so I could see, hear, smell, taste and touch. He gave me a wife to love and be loved by. He gave me children to nurture and enjoy. And He gave me work to do.

For the past few weeks, I’ve been leading a Bible study about heaven, so I’ve been thinking a lot about it. Randy Alcorn’s book, Heaven, has been a great resource. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it.

So what do sunny days, physical bodies and heaven have to do with each other?

Everything.

Before they were deceived by Satan and sin entered the picture, Adam and Eve walked with God in the garden. They had physical bodies designed to enjoy the world God had created for them. They ate delicious food. They felt the warmth of the sun. They enjoyed each other. They experienced intimacy with God. All on this earth.

That was God’s original design. We were to live with Him on earth. God did not simply create us as spiritual beings that would live only in a spiritual realm.

We will have bodies in heaven. And heaven will be on earth. The earth will one day be made new and God will restore things to the way they were supposed to be. The idea that we’ll be disembodied spirits and float around in the clouds is false. And honestly, a really boring thought.

If that’s a new idea to you, then I encourage you to read Randy’s book and study Revelation 21 and 22 for yourself.

Here’s the thing to remember–the very best this life and this world have to offer are simply a very small taste of what’s to come. The best vacation, the best day at work, the best meal you’ve ever eaten, the most beautiful sunset you’ve ever seen, the greatest sex* you’ve ever experienced, the most moving song you’ve ever listened to, the most intimate relationship you’ve ever shared…are all just glimpses of what’s to come.

Whenever you experience the best this life can offer–let it remind you that heaven will be better. Far better. Better than you can even imagine. Whatever you can imagine–the reality will be better. God Himself is preparing heaven for us. There’s no way we can out-imagine an infinite, loving, perfectly good, amazingly creative God.

*(Just so there’s no confusion–Jesus taught that there won’t be marriage in heaven. I take that to mean there also won’t be sex in heaven. But if what we experience in this life is just a taste, a foreshadowing of what life will be like in heaven, then I think we can anticipate something even better than sex.)